Thinking College For Your ASD Child?

This was just sent to me via email. I think it is worth sharing to our readers!
Special College Programs For Autistic Kids!

The Latest Autism Research Via PBS NewHour

Last week, PBS NewsHour's, ROBERT MACNEIL reports on Autism in 4 episodes.  He has a personal connection with autism because his grandson if also affected.  I was impressed with his journalism and think this it is worth watching, if you haven't already. The link below will take you to the video episode that focuses on the most recent autism research and opinions. 

PBS NewsHour - Autism's Causes 

Watch the full episode. See more PBS NewsHour.

Blog Upated

My oldest son just informed me that I needed to get my blog back up to date.  It has been a year since I last posted on my blog.  The past year seems a big blur and I think being a mom of kids with disabilities, speeds things up!

A few topics I will touch on this year:

1. I will be reviewing books sent to me by book publishing company, Future Horizons. They publish books about autism and other disabilities.  I can't wait to give my review of Temple Grandin's book, The Way I See It.
2. Update you on my latest journeys with the education system.
3. Medical updates and new research taking place for Autism and Mitochondrial Disease.
4. Personal Stuff!

What's on the Menu?

Casey Loves Hamburgers!

Aspie kids tend to eat the same foods. In our home we are always trying to introduce new foods in the hopes that something will tickle the kid’s taste buds. Casey our oldest son eats very few things. He would eat hamburgers everyday of his life if we allowed him. Now on the menu in the Dean house is milk, shrimp, snow crabs, chicken and biscuits with gravy, anything subs related, cheese pizza, sugar snap peas, bananas, apples, french toast sticks, breakfast egg and cheese sandwich, and let us not forget the french fry.  Only Publix brand O.J. can be in the house because Casey can taste the difference. This is just to name a few of the very few items on the menu. We were blown away the other day when Casey came home and informed us that after an "Olive Garden" party in his 3rd period class, he officially liked spaghetti and meatballs! Surprising, since Casey's dad is Italian and we have never been able to get him to eat red sauce. Some days these kids just decide they like something. There is neither rhyme nor reason, it just is.

Baby Boy Morgan Dean Born March 9th!

My little boy was born on March 9th.  He was 9.6 pounds and 21.5 inches long.  

Morgan Augustine Dean

For all those who follow this blog; I want to inform you that I will not be vaccinating Morgan.  At age two we will have a test done to check his for his natural antibodies and only then will we determine our next move with the vaccine debate.  At birth Morgan was given a 9.9 apgar score .  He is a very healthy infant.

Things that make me thankful.

Casey

This new school year has been far from boring. The anxiety is gone and my rambunctious boys are adjusting well. We have had a few bumps in the road but so far, I am very pleased. Last year was a bit chaotic and I did not have much to be sincerely thankful for. However, this year has been a blessing. I think it is important to acknowledge the good with the bad.

Friday was a great example of the life and day in the Dean home. All the kids went off to school and the house was calm. Around 1 P.M. I recieved a phone call from the ESE Vice Principle at H.M.S. She had good news. Our oldest son Casey had obtained a 103 on a math test. This was great news! Casey got on the phone and expressed how excited he was for his wonderful accomplishment. You see, Casey excels in all his gifted classes but math. I honestly think he has never had a "real" math teacher before. We realized there may be a problem with his math teacher a few months ago and expressed our concerns with the school administration. In years past, many times,  the administration would have ignored our concerns but not this school. They looked into the situation and took it upon themselves to switch Casey’s math teacher. The new teacher had much more experience and history at the school. Sure enough, the first week in the new classroom Casey received his first A+ in math for the 2009-2010 school year. Not only is he performing better but Casey has informed us that his new teacher makes him feel “confident” in himself.

Words can’t express how thankful I am to the staff/administration at Casey’s middle school. They have gone above and beyond my expectations. The School experience has such a huge impact on our children. Being a mom with three children with special needs, I deal with the school system constantly. Many times, I am left feeling unheard and defeated. However, when a school steps up and actually works hard for your child, well, it’s a down right amazing! I say “bravo” to the wonderful teachers and staff who actually give a dam!

Evan

Now, later that day, I received another phone call from the elementary school my other children attend. My son Evan had a melt down in the lunchroom. I laughed a little thinking how a day going so well is derailed by another phone call. Such is the life of a mom. Our kids keep us on our toes. No time to become complacent. I am certain these won’t be the last phone calls I receive this year. Nevertheless, for today, I am feeling very thankful.

How Stigma's Can Kill - Jett Travolta

Travolta’s sons had Autism & Seizures. His story hits home to me... Because it seems he received very little emotional support/trust. Whether it's your church, school or a family member, no one should deny or be ashamed of a child's sickness. Travolta's son may have never received proper medical care through-out his life because of misconceptions of his illness via Scientology. My heart goes out to the Travolta's

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

The children have started school and so far the first two weeks have went well. Surprisingly, Evan ,who I wrote about in my last post is thriving at his new school. The teacher has him doing grade level work and she is very impressed with his productivity. Maxwell loves kindergarten. Starting school makes him feel like a big boy now! Casey seems to be adjusting well to middle school. I am sure this would not be possible without the impressive measures his gifted 6Thu grade teacher has taken. So far, we feel very blessed with the start of the new school year.

I always remind my readers why I started this blog. For me, it has become a great way to vent my frustrations and share my joys raising my special children. Many who write blogs know how therapeutic they are. With that said, I need to vent my latest frustrations pertaining to my children's disabilities and the lack of support I get from a close family member. I am certain I am not the only mother of disabled children who has experienced this and I would love to hear from you.

I have a sibling who has been saying horrid things about me and my children for years. My goal is to not let it get to me. To be honest, this person has been diagnosed bi-polar in the past, so I try to look at the source. I am always telling myself, to just let it go. My belief is that people who are mentally ill, can't truly make good judgements. Their mind is cloudy.

You never expect a loved one to turn on you when you need them the most. You would think that no matter what, blood is thicker then water. But I have learned this is not true. Through my darkest hours I have found such disappointment with my sibling. My oldest child was diagnosed with Mitochondrial Disease after a muscles biopsy was preformed. This was a very serious procedure. He, along with his brothers have been seen by three neurologists. One of the neurologists even works for the Muscular Dystrophy Association and all see the same disease. This year, Casey was approved for a power-chair so he doesn't have to walk long distances; the chair will help him conserve energy. I was told that my youngest child will never be able to play sports because his joints are too weak and loose. All my children have brand new bikes but they have never taken to riding them. Their muscle weakness and lack of coordination makes it almost impossible. Casey can tie his shoes but when they come undone, he tends to walk on the laces which destroys them. To prevent him from tripping and destroying his shoes we started using slip-ons. Kids with Asperger Syndrome have poor self awareness and are sloppy by nature. Our goal is to adapt to new situations instead of pointing out flaws in our kids.

The most important thing is that our children feel accepted and loved. I embrace their wonderful qualities and try not to point out their imperfections. I am fortunate to have children with very high IQ's. They have never been held back and are advancing well in school. Education is a priority in our home.

As much as I would love to see them play sports and stay out side all day, my children will never be those children. And if anyone would love to see an athlete in the family it would be me. I was All-State in track. I also played basketball in high school. But the disease my children have prevents them from participating in sports. I once dreamed of going to my kids games but I had to build new dreams. Dreams that are more realistic. The sad thing here is, my sibling thinks my children are not sick. That I have made them sick in my mind and all the doctors are liars.

Yes, that is correct, I made my children sick. All this is my fault and I am a bad mother. What mother doesn't let their children ride bikes or tie their shoes? All the doctors are wrong, they just want my money, even the MDA doctors. I suppose my kids don't have seizures either. And

the medication's they take are for nothing. Casey's need to use a chair is just a lie I created in my head. This is what I have been hearing for years. Each year my children get sicker. Each year we prepare for the worst. I can't tell you how this breaks my heart. Support needs to come from family. I know God is looking down and shaking his head.

Yes, I must consider the source. This is what I tell myself every time I hear about the poison coming out of certain person's mouth. This is a person who a few years ago almost killed their child while driving drunk at 4 A.M. in the morning. The parent had taken the child out with them while parting with friends. The vehicle later flipped and the child was ejected through the wind shield but angels protected him. His only injuries were bruises and scratches. The social worker spoke to me. She said the police officer was appalled because the driver didn't remember they had a child in the car. He was found later lying under a tree crying. Charges are just now being served. Then there have been the many events that led to Children And Family services being called for possible abuse/neglect charges. These same children who need therapy from abuses I will not speak of in this post, yet none is ever received because of fear of what the children might say. Yes, my children may be sheltered but I embrace my children's innocence. Children shouldn't be made to grow up too fast. Yes, I must consider the source.

With all this, I can honestly say I love this family member and would never wish harm on them. But I do not think they feel the same about me or my children. Some people on earth have so much hate in their hearts that they bring about the worst karma. I believe when you live a life of hatred and darkness you bring on a world of bad to your life. This makes me very sad because I believe this is happening to my sibling. And they don't even realize it. How could you wish ill-will on others and not expect that karma to come back on you?

Enough of this rant. The therapy of writing is truly amazing. I am sorry this post is so negative and sad. But sometimes life is not a bed of flowers. Remember, this blog is about my life and my sick children . I write about the good, the bad and the ugly. Not only is it therapeutic for me but I hope it helps other families not feel so alone on their own life journey.

Summer is almost over - Back To School Soon!

Yet another summer is leaving us! Soon children will try to sleep in as long as possible before the bus arrives to take them to school. My kids never sleep in late during the summer or the weekends. They are early risers, except on school days! I am now preparing myself for the morning battles of 'Waking the kids up"!

This new school year will be very interesting. Max starts kindergarten. Evan is going into the 4Th grade and Casey is entering middle school. For a parent of three children with disabilities I am preparing for the journey I like to call, "The Public School System". So many mazes and turns, oh my! Yes, I know I sound a bit sarcastic but to be honest I am a bit jaded as of late. I think many parents on the same path as mine know what I am talking about. Being an advocate for your children is not easy. You sometimes have to deal with people that really don't have the background or knowledge to understand or educate your child. You see, the "system" is not perfect, far from it.

For example: my son Evan was in a mild mixed grade ESE class. At first,I was impressed with his teacher but first impressions can be deceiving. Later in the year I noticed that even though his report card showed passing grades, his teacher said he wasn't doing 3rd grade reading. He was only capable of 2Nd grade work, so in theory, he would not pass the Fcat. This would cause him to be held back. Off to our IEP meeting I went!

Now, most parents would like to think that the ESE teacher has specialized training. We hope they are on top of their game when it comes to our children's education. I mean, that is the impression that they give you at these big IEP meetings right? Wrong! This is where I became truly jaded with the public school system. But first let me share with you a bit about my son.

Evan is one of those kids that could care less about his grades. To him, the sooner he can finish an assignment the better. And he will do what ever it takes to achieve that goal. This includes pretending that he can't read, filling in answers with random words that make no sense and just not reading the assignment. He is a true manipulator, which if very common in gifted kids. Not all smart kids want to be productive in school. My son is what you would call, a non-achiever! My husband was also one of those kids. The irony of it all, my husband is now a Chair/Course Director at a local University.

So off we go to the IEP meeting which the teacher decides to keep real small. Only the teacher, Occupational Therapist and myself attended. Which in Heine site I should have refused. Hey, I am still learning. Next time I will be smarter! Anyway, so the teacher precedes to tell me Evan will most likely not pass 3rd grade because he has a reading comprehension problem. I am informed that he has only been exposed to 2ND grade work. All tests she has given him show there is no way he will pass the Fcat. Now, I was a little blown away by this. Because my son is a prolific reader at home. He, along with his older brother love books. They have books falling from the rafters in their room and some are college level books. My son begs to go to book fairs, for the love of god! So, you see, I was a bit surprised by her statements.

I told her she was wrong. And of course she rolled her eyes not once but twice at me as she informed me tests don't lie. I adamantly told her, my son can read and tests do lie if a child is just bubbling in answers to complete the work. She again, told me no, he had a reading comprehension problem. I am laughing now thinking about this latest episode I experienced. You see, Evan had already taken the FCat days before my meeting with his lovely "experienced ESE teacher" so in no way could I help him prepare for the doom she now had bestowed on me. My son was going to repeat the 3rd grade. She pretty much guaranteed it!

In my heart of hearts,I knew that teacher was wrong. The one thing people in the education system need to realize is good parents know their children. And it is important to listen to what we have to say. On the last day of school my son came home and informed me he recieved a 4 on the Reading portion of the FCat. He was going onto the 4Th grade. My son, who wasn't even exposed to 3rd grade reading assignments all year because his teacher was clueless. He received a 4 out of the highest score of 5. I even called the school to make sure he was telling me the truth. HM, I wonder what he would have recieved had she actually taught him?

The teacher never contacted me. And thankfully he will get a fresh start at a new school this year. After this last episode my husband and I have come to the realization that we need to have his IQ properly tested. He obviously out smarted his own teacher. I don't want my child to be a non-achiever when he has so much potential!

This is just one of the many stories I could tell about my journey in the "Public School System". Now don't get me wrong, there are many good teachers out there. We have had good experiences too. But I can't help but think, here comes yet another year of advocating for my kids. Another year of dealing with the flawed education system. My goal is to stay positive and not to take things personally. I think many parents of kids with disabilities have these same anxieties. So just realize that as you wake your lovely children up for the first day of school, parents across the country are doing the same thing. They have the same struggles and anxieties. When ever you get down just think, this too shall pass.